its time to talk gifts , those things your parents give you to bond with you and show their love .

When I was about eight my father whom wanted to bond with me and tried to share intrests with me , got me a tether plane , read this name aloud and think on what sort of crazed parent would buy such an abomination .

A tether plane was just what the name implied , a gas powered plane attached to a plastic tether line which when you raise it above your head would fly in circles around you and if you possessed a bit of manual dexterity you could make it performn tricks .

So my dad and me are out behind a row of warehouses he stocked carpet in and carpeting supplies and he was showing me how this toy worked but needed to run inside to use the mens room leaving me alone with this ....toy

I in my youth and inexperiance had watched my dad do loop de loops and such and figured I could do the same so with a bit of experimentation I started up the small plastic and metal toy and let it take to the air while I firmly gripped its tether .

but merely flying it in circles was not enough for me

withing a few seconds I was attempting dips and loops ....

the problem with standing still in one spot and attempting dips and loops with a gas powered brightly colored flying piece of metal is what happens when the tether wraps around you because you lowered your arm below your head .

what do you do as a gas powered abomination pins your arms to your side and flies in smaller and smaller circles

well you eventually get smacked in the face by the lil beast and get knocked on your rear as the propeller tries to eat your hair .

luckily my dad emerged from the mens room just in time to use his buck knife to get me free and to cut out a gob of my hair that the plane had tried to eat .

After he was sure I was mostly okay he laughed as did I and He bought me several other toys that didn't fly or require tethers and we told mom I got gum in my hair after falling out of a tree .

I don't think she belived it but we held fast to our story and werent questioned on the particulars too much

....

seriously dad WTF a gas powered plane with a tether for your eight year old ?

aww good times good times

next week I shall regale you with the story of how I got dragged behind my dads truck through a mud puddle , lost my pants and drank my first beer at the ripe age of 9